way to long

HOLY CRAP I HAVEN'T BLOGGED SINCE DECEMBER?!?!?!?!
that is a lie! sorry to anyone who actually read my blog (I doubt anyone did) for not writing! you see my lovely readers... again if there are any of you...HI THERE!!...i has a new blog on tumblr which i use alot more, almost everyday so if you wanna check it out here's the link http://xocherrybomb.tumblr.com/ YAY LINKS!!!
so you may ask, " what have you been doing lately? " well I have been laying around for 3 weeks, yea im sick ...AGAIN! my appendix is acting up, darn thing! oh well, these things happen... to tell you the truth i have a feeling that it is very possible that this time tomorrow I could be in the hospital because of the severe pain... I kinda wanna go now but its 1 am and i do not wanna disturb my mom, she already hasnt been sleeping well because of worrying about me... aint she just a doll? yup, yup she is! well im not gunna lie i dont have anything to say right now, im sorta half outta it. so maybe i'll blog again later today when it isnt early in the am. but if you do read this blog and are bored cause i dont use it much anymore then check out my tumblr... oh look heres the loink again! http://xocherrybomb.tumblr.com/ ... its like magic!! =D
--aliciaa

here i go again on my own...maybe?

maybe she's right. maybe its time i stop being a chicken shit and i just tell you, or at least talk to you. at this point i'd even take a rejection to stop this feeling. and to stop the dreams. ive liked guys alot before, same amount as you but ive never had dreams about them. so maybe you are different. its not like the dreams are bad either. they all end pretty well so maybe i should just take a deep breath and take the plunge? its to terrifying though. i had someone tell me they thought i was fearless after knowing me for about a month. now she can see otherwise. ive been nervous around guys before but never like this. and oddly enough i think your kinda having the same feeling i do. every so often it seems like i catch you staring at me. maybe its just my imagination though, if you were staring im sure you would say something. so maybe ill just be on my own like ive been for the past year and a bit but maybe not. so if yuor reading this wanna let me know what you think so i can stop waking up even more confused and falling for you more and more. thanks <3
--aliciaa

uhoh

I hope I'm not just making these signs up in my head. That would truly suck! It seems so right, but maybe it's all just my imagination. I don't know what to believe anymore. I thought my imagination was slowly getting worse but if this whole thing is in my head I guess I was wrong, cause I even have myself fooled with this. Just so you know I think I really like you, but I could be wrong.
--aliciaa

its a long way down

So it's been over a month since I last blogged. That just goes to show you how boring my life has been and still is. Let's see, what's new with me. Well, I got Hedley's new cd. I went to Ottawa on a school trip and I'm going to the States next week. Nothing overly interesting though. Most interesting thing going on right now is mine and Althea's obsession with my 16th b-day *wink wink* oh if only you knew what this really means!
OH AND IF ONLY YOU KNEW! how i fell that is. By the way cause I know Althea will read this I'm still freaked out about my convo with a certain someone yesterday, it has truly weirded me out!! and now i can't get him outta my head. like i think im going insane.
maybe ill blog later today cause ill get bored i unno. so bye for now.
--aliciaa

thanks.

Im sick and tired of being sick and tired.
A line I have heard to much in my life.
I hate feeling like this
I hate feeling like I'm missing tons of school
I hate feeling like my teachers hate me
I hate feeling like kids don't like me cause they think I'm a walking disease
I hate feeling like I should live in a bubble
>>>>>yes like bubble boy<<<<<
I hate lots of things right now.
I hate how i always end up typing in a list form.

There are a few things I love.
I love the friends that stick by me
I love how these friends do everything they can to make me happy.
I love knowing these friends are true
I love knowing these friends would never abandon me
I love knowing I can always count on themm
I love knowing they will always be there
I love knowing that they are my friends

Here's a little story>>>
I've been sick for 3 days now. I have this one particular friend who spent these 3 days talking to me every chance she could trying to make me feel better and just keeping me company. She could have been doing a million other things but she chose to keep me company. I miss her and I know she misses me. She helped me keep my sanity well I've been home, talking about pretty much everything, joking around, goofing off, annoying people and failing miserably. without her these last few days would have been a major drag, I'm so lucky to have a friend like her. So thanks again you dont know how much I appreciate you!

Loooooser

Is it so wrong that when I see you my heart skips a beat, my breathing halts and my mind stops working. Nothing comes out right and I know I start laughing like a hyena. The butterflies start movie around at ultra speeds and I feel like I'll throw up at any given moment.
This happens not only when I see you but just thinking about you all these feelings come out. Too bad that just seeing you makes me so emotionally confused that I want to crawl into a dark hole even though your like the sun to me. So don't worry I'll just stare and wonder what its like to be held in your arms.

--aliciaa

I think I'll draw the line

I think I'm done.
I'm done with crushes.
I'm done with boys.
I'm done with likeing people who never return my feelings.
I'm done with stressing over how good I like for you.
I'm done with you not noticing me.
I'm done with thinking of you.
I'm done with hopeing you'll talk to me.
I'm done with cringing everytime i see you in the hall.
I'm done with the naucious feeling I get when I see you or hear your name.
I'm done with those butterflies that make me sick although it's the greatest feeling in the word.
I'm done with mixed signals.
I'm done with over analyzing things that I notice about your reactions.
I'm just done.

...I wish all that was true, cause truth betold babe i can't stop thinking about you!!

--aliciaa